Monday, May 27, 2013

So You Want To Be Famous*, Eh?

We know what you're thinking. Yes please. Oh yes, I do. I've been dying to make everyone cheer and shout and drool profusely at my good looks and brilliance. Just tell me how!

Your future fans. You know you want to be in their iPhones. And we know
you know. So let us help you out.

Well for starters it would help if you were a writer: a writer with something up your sleeve you consider worth sharing. Fiction, poetry, engaging non-fiction, non-fiction masquerading as fictive poetry: whatever. If this sounds like you then we encourage you to send some of your work our way so we can see if you'd be a suitable to come a-Ruckus makin' (as in to come and read at one of our events.) Although high-quality writing will always be the belle of the what-we-value ball, we are also looking for work that is particularly fun and engaging. Though it is by no means necessary to do so, if you want to find a way to add any interactive or performative elements we will probably look at you fondly and coo. Okay not really because that sounds pretty off-putting, but what we're trying to say is that we'd like it. A lot.

For second-ups it would help if you were in a band, or perhaps were yourself a stand-alone music-producing entity. While, as people, we value and appreciate all kinds of music, we'll admit that we'll be looking for something with a little bit of spunk for our shows. Think "Ruckus," but the kind you want to hear rather than the kind that the people above your apartment are making or that small children produce when they come face to face with pots and/or open cutlery drawers. Send some files or videos our way to check out.  

For thirds, it would help if you did we-don't-even-know-what. Maybe you write one-man plays or juggle books or swallow scrabble tiles with flare or an engaging sort of pizzazz. Until you pitch your idea we might not even know how bad we need you. We're open to hearing you out. The ball's in your court. (The tiles are in your tray?)

The place to direct the above-requested samples of the work (or the ideas) prerequisite to your pending fame is:

Now's not the time to be modest or shy or a self-effacing homebody. The manner of self-assessment we'd recommend you engage in before eliciting our attention we'd describe as 'fair' or 'discerning' or 'generously sober' or, alternatively, 'soberly generous,' or simply as 'just consider letting someone other than your mom look at your stuff to help you to decide.' We'll read and/or listen to what you send us and if we think it'll jive with our groove we'll probably soon be begging at your email-account's door to recruit you.

Keep in mind we're just starting out. As people we promise we are not very intimidating. We still get excited when people like our facebook page (rare), or say "cool man" instead of ignoring us when we tell them what we're doing. We're pretty nice. You can ask our friends. Or just go ahead and send us some work or come on out to our event and find out!

One final note: We're not sure how much response we'll be getting for this call. Thus, we can not make any guarantees about how long it will take us to get back to you. However, we can promise that any patience you may have to expend will be rewarded, and we'll get back to you as soon as we can.

*Qualification: We do mean famous in an entirely marginal way. Famous as in, known, cheered for, and adored (in proportion to the level of your entertainingness and/or talent) amongst ourselves, our friends, maybe your friends, the people peering through The Only Cafe's steamy windows, and whatever other company the please-keep-rolling snowball of our reading series happens to force into its orbit.

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